So Happy To So Sad

                                                                  Wally and Tug

The summer had been filled with a lot of high and low spots.  The Library programs were busy and really fun.  One of the really low spots came from our dear neighbor, Danny Mento having a relapse of his Adult Onset Leukemia that had been a problem for the past ten years or so.

Danny had never appeared to be ill.  He was still selling Oldsmobiles by day and playing his saxophone with his jazz combo by night looking sharp in his tuxedo. Mary Jane, his wife, did not drive so I became her taxi driver to go visit him at the hospital.  These two people were really quite a pair of characters.  They had been married for close to forty years, had one daughter they adorned living in Colorado and complained about each other constantly most of the time to each other. Danny being 100% Italian enjoyed the fact that Mary Jane did not drive, cook or actually do much of anything.  Mary Jane was really proud of the fact that she could pretend to be totally helpless and this is how she kept Danny from wandering off all those years.

As the summer progressed Danny began showing signs of being much more ill and his daughter, Jennifer and grandson Joey, arrived from Colorado. Jennifer really was as wonderful as her parents had proclaimed and we became instant friends.  Shortly after she arrived Danny did pass away.  I did not realize how hard it would be on me losing him as I had loved his pizza and treats he brought the boys and how much he loved Wes and Wally, sons he never had.  He used to yell "Hey, Sweet Thing" over the back fence when he saw me in the yard and I would miss all his stories and his flirting with me.

I am not a fan of funeral viewing so I volunteered to take care of Joey that evening.  There were over a thousand people that came to both the viewing and the Catholic service the next day.  Afterwards there was what I learned was a typical Catholic wake at the house with stories of all the funny and kind things Danny had done.  I did find out that they had buried Danny in his tuxedo with his saxophone. His mother said that now he could entertain everyone in heaven but I told her he entertained everyone everyday just by being Danny.

With the busy and sad summer that it had been it was nice to be invited to go to Block Island for the Labor Day weekend.  This Oklahoma person knew nothing about Block Island, Rhode Island but a get away was a very pleasant thought.  Looking at the road atlas we were going to have to drive 256 miles through upstate New York then all along the coast of Connecticut to Rhode Island, get on a ferry boat and go 14 Miles through the waters of Block Island Sound.

                                        Block Island Harbor

Block Island has quite a history from Indian settlements to being occupied by the British navy during the War of 1812 to being used by the Navy during World War II.  There is actually a German sub laying in the water seven miles from the island that was sunk.  The two ways to get to the island are by boat or ferry or the small commuter airport that was built in 1950.  There are two lighthouses that were constructed in the mid-1800's. The Southeast Lighthouse leads into the Old Harbor and sits on 200 foot high Mohegan Bluff while the North Lighthouse warns of a sandbar extending out from that end of the island.

The island is only six miles long and three miles wide.  The population of full time residents numbered only about fifty.  There is always wind and temperatures are ten degrees cooler in the summer and warmer in the winter than the mainland.  It can be foggy and damp in the morning and evening with brilliant sun during the day. It's two harbors and quaint hotels and gifts shops attract visitors as well as it's 20 miles of sandy beaches.

Labor Day weekend is the biggest weekend of celebration on the island.  The Old Harbor is filled with motorized boats and the Great Salt Pond on the opposite side of the island is filled with sailboats of all sizes.  The population on that weekend can swell to over three thousand people filling the hotels along the harbor which were built a hundred years ago. The house that Sis' daughter and son-in-law owned was perched high on a bluff over looking the Great Salt Pond and all the wonderful sailboats.  It was an old boarding house built way before the turn of the century. There were seven tiny bedrooms and one bathroom that had been added downstairs at some point in time.  Somehow I don't think Dennis liked the accommodations but the boys and I thought we had died and gone to heaven.

We spent five days exploring the lighthouses, going to all the little shops and restaurants, picking blueberries in the yard of the house and spending every afternoon on the beach so the boys could build sandcastles and fly kites. There was no television so evenings were spent enjoying sitting in the yard until dark.  I will always remember that the two really great vacations that I had were in one summer happily enjoying the East Coast beaches.

By the time we got home it was time for the boys to start back to school as well as my first day back in college.  I had found that Burlington Community College just fifteen minutes from Riverton had a class in Calculus based Physics. The best way to describe how I felt driving to the community college that day was sheer terror.  I questioned myself on just why I doing this?  It had been seven years since I graduated from TWU and never in one second of the time had I used calcucus.  On the drive I could not even tell you one thing about Physics and maybe I should just turn the car around and go back home and forget all this.

I didn't turn the car around and did manage to find the classroom.  Glancing around the room did not install anything positive but only more terror.  All the other students, about forty of them, looked like children.  They looked at me wondering what Grandma Moses was doing there and I was further confused by no individual seating but long tables and chairs for everyone to sit at. Where was the individual desk at the back of the classroom where I could hide?

Once everyone was settled into seats at the tables I noticed a guy wondering around tinkering with some of the stuff on a huge table that ran the length of the room. Then all of a sudden there was a loud bang and a stuffed Yogi Bear toy fell from the ceiling. Then there was a loud voice that said "That was an example of Physics.  Welcome to class and let's get started."  

The loud, booming voice came from Dr. Grey who did not look much older than some of the just-out-of-high-school kids that filled the tables.  He was only about five foot five, very thin and stomped around in cowboy boots.  Who wears cowboy boots in New Jersey?  To perhaps make matters worse our grades were going to be based on 50% tests and 50% lab reports. He stated that homework was just busy work and that we were on our own to learn each section of the class in whatever was the best way for us.  He also said something about practice tests being available on the computer in the Library.  Computer? This was 1983. What was a computer and how does one use one?

I drove back to Riverton after class and had thoughts about not going back.  Dr. Grey had spent two hours talking about stuff that was all Greek to me but at the same time the class was quite intriguing. Could I really remember all those calculus formulations I learned years ago?  There was something rather interesting in all the demonstrations, things falling from the ceiling and loud noises that made you wonder and want to learn.  Maybe I would hang in the class for awhile and see how this goes.

That night I will always remember as one of the worst nights of my life.
Here I must admit that I had made and would make in the future many dumb decisions and choices.  My inability to speak up or to cause controversy, a Hansen family trait, made me regret to this day that I let this happen.

All four of us were sitting at the table in the kitchen discussing the first day back at school for the boys and I when little almost nine year old Wally said "Dad, when are we going to go get Tug?".  Dennis had taken him to a kennel before we left for Block Island.  Actually that sounded like a good idea since it was worrisome to have the neighbor kids take care of him and I did not have the time to do it.

Dennis then told the boys we were not going to go get him and that he had actually given him to some woman.  Whatever else Dennis said I do not remember due to feeling like my heart had been ripped out.  Wally was in tears begging for Dennis to go get him, saying he would take care of him and on and on. Wes was furious and wanted his dog back. And what did I do or say?  Nothing.

I will go to my grave wishing at that moment I had told Dennis exactly what I thought about him being so cruel and heartless to give away a member of the family that the boys and I loved dearly. Actually that everyone in town loved.  It was his idea to pay a huge sum of money for a registered English Springer Spaniel in the first place. I did not want another dog because he had hated, mistreated or was glad when any other dog we had was gone.  Agreeing to getting Tug in the first place was my mistake but how could I not want such an adorable puppy?  Was Dennis jealous because we all loved the Tug?  Or was he just purely a mean and terrible person far beyond what I had thought before? Why did I not demand he go get Tug back? 

I have often wondered if Wes and Wally thought I was in on the plot to give Tug away?  I really never believed Dennis gave Tug to some woman but just dumped him at a pound.  After the boys were in bed that night I picked up all of Tugs toys but that did not keep me from crying  as I am now writing this.

What is the saying about having company for an extended time?  Is it something about smelling dead fish?  Having Alpha and Hazel for close to three weeks was actually a lot of fun but it was also very nice when they headed home and life around the house could settle back into being more normal.  Normal that summer seemed to be playing with children all day.

It was very interesting to find out that so many of the children in Riverton did not have much of an idea about what lied beyond the city limits.  The reason I had taken the children to Philadelphia and other interesting places the summer before was that I discovered that so many of them had never seen the Liberty Bell, Independence Hall, the Art Museum or many of the other sights within a few miles of where they lived.

When I was growing up, even though vacations were out of the question, my parents did take us on adventures to Tulsa to the zoo, the art museum, Branson, Missouri when it was only a post office and little grocery store and once to Oklahoma City to see an exhibit on atoms and stars. My poor children were dragged to everything within a day's driving time every place we lived.  This was my inspiration for the children's library field trips.

That summer we did the historical part of Philadelphia as they all wanted to see the Liberty Bell again, added the Ben Franklin Museum which turned into two trips to see everything but the best one was the ship museum. Philadelphia had a tall ship moored at Market Square with a wonderful museum. For the sum of fifty cents per child they would do a program on sailing ships. The children sat in a little auditorium while a gentleman explained how the Vikings, Christopher Columbus and the tall ships sailed the seas.

I must say I was as spellbound as the children when we learned about the Vikings in the open boats covered with animal skins to keep from freezing and how the boats rocked back and forth.  The perils Christopher Columbus faced sailing in those three really tiny ships when so many at that time thought the world was flat and they would simply fall off the edge and finally the magnificent Tall Ships.  After the lecture they toured the museum with artifacts from the Titanic and other ships.
A history lesson for them all to remember.

The children's books were flying off the shelf.  They all wanted the chance to win a trip to the shore again at the end of the summer.  But the fun part for them was getting to do another play.  Doing a short version of the Wizard of Oz last summer was great but available children's plays was a little slim and most of them were pretty simple.  While tanning on the beach I got the idea that all the children loved Sesame Street, it had great characters and I had watched enough of the shows that I knew something about how the story lines went so I just wrote a play.

The story line was that Donny Osmond came to visit Sesame Street.  Miss Piggy was, of course, in love with him tossing Kermit aside, Statler and Waldorf sat of to the side heckling everyone, especially Fozzie Bear. There were dancing mice, The Count, Oscar, Big Bird and all the other characters.  Needless to say the children loved the idea and everyone pretty well picked out the part they wanted to be without arguing or getting hurt feelings. The hardest part of the whole production was my discovery that the kindergarten age cast members did not know how to read the script. After the tears dried up the rest of the cast helped them to simply memorize their lines. My dear son Wes had to play Donnie Osmond since he was the oldest, tallest and would not have been in the play if he had to play some other part.

I will never be able to figure out how thirty children put on a flawless performance to a standing room only audience.  The parents had really jumped in and helped on costumes, we used our scenery from the 4th of July float and the children had done an awesome job of learning all their lines and the songs in less then four weeks  when practice was pretty limited with all the other things going on. My only thought was that in giving them a play with characters they understood and really thought of as their friends made the difference.  I was in tears before it was over as I was so proud of them.

Perhaps the programs at the Library were a little over the top and not usually what a Library does.  But I have to admit that their were a couple of reasons for my planning them.  First, the Library was my job and after I learned the Dewey Decimal System there was not much to do except ordering new books and being nice to the Library patrons.The job needed to be fun and interesting in order for me to want to go to work everyday.  

The second reason was really rather selfish.  I had two boys ages thirteen and nine who needed something to do everyday while I was at work. No way were they going to do well with a babysitter or sit at the Library all day.  So I just came up with things they would like to do and let the rest of the children in town join in.  It turned out to be a win win situation for everyone involved.  The children got to see their friends everyday, they read a lot of books, learned a lot of historical facts, got to be in plays that the school did not have time for and stayed busy and happy all summer. Unlike most parents I was always sad when school started and summer was over.

That summer I was a little too busy to go to the Friday Craft/Pot-Luck Lunch/Swimming Pool Party at Bay's House.  It was a gathering of the lifelong Riverton ladies, their children and grandchildren. Bay was a lady in her sixties, a Quaker with a heart of gold who taught every child in Riverton how to swim every summer.  She had gotten to the point where she did not hear very well and could not wear her hearing aids in the pool. My oldest son, Wes, swam like a fish from the time he was five. At the start of the summer Bay asked if Wes could help her with the swimming lessons as she would not be able to hear the children in the pool.

I was a little surprised that she asked.  Wes was, shall we say, at times a child who would make any parent want to drink being highly energetic, always coming up with some big deal and always moving at the speed of light. His attributes were that he was very intelligent, very articulate and an amazing artist for his age even if he did only draw race cars and drag strip layouts. He, for whatever reason wanted to help Bay and part of my planning for all the Library activities that summer worked around his swimming schedule.  If I had any doubts that Wes could help Bay I was certainly wrong.  He not only did a great job he also became the preteen idol of every child that took the lessons.  He rather liked being the local idol and I was very pleased to know he could behave so well in public.

Just before Labor Day when I thought the fun of the summer was over and it was time to start thinking about school for both the boys and I we got a surprise invitation.  Sis and Gus, my neighbors and best friends, had a daughter and son-in-law that lived in Williamsburg, Va.  He was the Lt. Governor and the crowds of people were at times more than they could bear so they bought a huge rambling old house on Block Island, Rhode Island for a peaceful place to getaway too.  

Needless to say Dennis was not overwhelmed with the thought of spending five days with a bunch of old people on an island fifty miles out in the Long Island Sound.  But this time he was out voted by two very excited sons and his wife.

It was one of those trips that even with the typical vacation problems with Dennis it was like dying and going to heaven.  However what happened when we returned home is something that makes me wonder how anyone could be so cruel and heartless.  I could understand Dennis doing that to me but how could he do it to the boys?

What is a Vacation?

When Dennis suggested that we rent a place on the beach at Sea Isle City, New Jersey for vacation I have to admit I was excited but horribly apprehensive at the same time. My history with vacations was far from good, so much so that I tried to avoid even thinking about the word "vacation".

Growing up there were two trips to Wisconsin to see Mother's family.  The first one Dad managed to run into the back of a trailer in Illinois and we had to have the headlights replaced in order to continue on.  At the age of six I was pretty small to realize any strife but I don't think Dad was too impressed with staying on a dairy farm for two weeks.  The next year Dad stayed home and Mother took my two brothers and I on the train. I remember having fun but that was the last time we did that.

When I was twelve Mother and Dad decided to rent a cabin in Colorado for two weeks in the mountains.  How much fun that was going to be!  Only they got in a spat loading the suitcases in the car.  Do you have any idea how small the interior of a 1956 Studebaker Golden Hawk was?  Small enough that Mother and Dad almost touched shoulders in the front seat. When we passed through the same western Oklahoma town twice in one hour Mother said to me "Donna, would you tell your Father he is on the wrong road".  I learned to read a map very quickly but they still did not speak to each other for the entire two weeks and probably for weeks after we got home. Thank heavens that was the end of family vacations.

Maybe I carry a vacation cloud over my head as they did not get any better after I married Dennis.  For many years there were trips out of town to drag race. One can't call those vacations by any means.  Those were drive all night to get someplace, attempt to race all day and drive all night to get home.  When Wes was three we actually planned a two week trip to Colorado.  In three days we saw a few sights, Dennis had read all his drag racing magazines, he tore a night light off the wall in the cabin because he couldn't get it to turn off one night and in three days we headed home. 

Perhaps I should not downgraded the Ford Motor Company trips. They all sounded fantastic, chance of a lifetime adventures to St. Maarten, Freeport, Nassau, a Cruise, and Spain.  They sounded fantastic but when you go as a host and have to keep anywhere from 300 to 500 people happy and on schedule it leaves a little to be desired.  Add to that Dennis did not travel well to put it mildly.  To be brief there were always clothes that were too small, people he could not deal with, horrible food, his suitcase not showing up and the inevitable illness that always occurred. 

Being an optimist I really did hope a week at the shore would be fun even with Dennis' Mother, Alpha, and his Aunt Hazel joining us but it is hard to shake seventeen years of vacation disasters.  Good points to remember was that the house was huge, three stories with four bedrooms, two bathrooms, a fully stocked kitchen plus the fact that you walked out the door onto the sand of the beach and a washer and dryer, everything brand new. Add to that was the fact that both ladies loved to cook and we were only a few blocks from the Boardwalk and lots of places to eat with good old American food. 

The stars must have been in line that week.  I am not sure what made that vacation be the only good one I can remember in all those years.  Was it just being at the shore where you did not need to do anything else but fly kites or make sand castles or work on a tan?  Were Alpha and Hazel a great buffer to keep Dennis from throwing one fit or another?  Did he not get sick because his Mom was cooking good old American food?  For one glorious week I wasn't stupid once, the boys had too much fun to fight or argue and Dennis was on his best behavior. I will never forget my long walks on the beach as the sun came up or went down, the laughter at the dinner table every night or the sheer beauty of the shore.  I will always thank Alpha and Hazel for that week as it would not have been the same without them.

Alpha and Hazel stayed another week after we got home and I did make some appearances at my job at the Library but they seemed to be doing very well without me.  Any time company came to visit I always jumped at the chance to take them to New York.  The two ladies had never been and a little reluctant to go but I managed to talk them into it so off we went.  They were worried about all the terrible things that could happen to them since they watched far too much television. I was determined to make it a trip of a lifetime to two rural Oklahoma ladies.

Bright and early one morning Alpha, Hazel, Wes and I headed up the Jersey Turnpike to New York City. Wally elected to stay and play with Sis all day since he was not crazy about New York at the age of nine.
I had carefully studied maps and sights to see because I was not all that good getting around in New York.  Mother liked to go to Macys, Tiffany's, eat at the Plaza Hotel or Trump Tower but that was Mother. This needed to be a different sightseeing tour.

I decided to do the Statue of Liberty and would have loved to go to Ellis Island but it was closed at that time.  I managed to take the Brooklyn Bridge into New York and find Battery Park which is a part of the city I had never been before. Alpha and Hazel were showing real signs of terror but I parked close to where you get on the Ferry and the parking guy started a conversation with me about being from Jersey.  I could see both ladies clutching their purses and waiting to have them ripped from their arms. But maybe they realized that even in New York people can be friendly. Off on the ferry for a tour of to the ferry, a great tour of the Statue and a ride back to the city in pretty cool fog.

Next I wanted to take them to mid-town Manhattan but truthfully I was a little lost.  Sitting in the left turn lane at a stop light a guy in a limo signaled to Wes to roll his window down.  Panic in the eyes of the two ladies.  He merely wanted to make an illegal turn out of the wrong lane and asked if he could turn in front of me.  I said sure if he could tell me how to get to mid-town. He said "Follow me", the deal was struck and off we went.  That was fascinating as we passed all the waterfront docks and drove under an overpass similar to what was in Serpico and where all the Mafia guys kill people in movies and on TV. I loved it, knowing we were breaking all speed limits but I knew the ladies had seen the same movies and TV that I had and were terrified. At some point the guy waved his arm out the window and sped away and I recognized the Empire State building so we had made it.

A tour of the Empire State building, lunch at a tiny Jewish Deli, my usual visit to Tiffany's and a visit to Central Park was all we could fit in the day before we headed back down the Jersey Turnpike.  I can imagine they went back to Warner, Oklahoma quite thankful they were still in one piece. Over the weekend the whole family did the grand tour of Philadelphia which like New York would take weeks to see everything.  Having people come to visit was always great fun for me as there was so much to see and do.

Oh, it might be time to show up at work.  That was really okay since it never seemed like a job.  The summer was going to be a busy one with the reading program, the area tours with the kids and a Muppet play I had written while getting all tan on the beach. I also had a bike safety program planned and a pet show. 

It was going to be a busy summer but a continuation of what had so far been a really fun one.