The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines Honeymoon as 1: a period of harmony immediately following a marriage 2: a period of unusual harmony especially following the establishment of a new relationship 3: a trip or a vacation taken by a newly married couple. From my experience the first two definitions with the word "harmony" do not quite seem to fit. Let's go with number 3. a trip or a vacation taken by a newly married couple. There is a noticeable omission of any adjectives like romantic or harmonious. Humorous and eventful fit better.
The wedding took place at 10:00 AM, the reception followed across town at my home and by 12:30 PM we were off on the trip to Red River, New Mexico. I have attended weddings and receptions that started at 2:00 in the afternoon and ended at 2:00 in the morning so this was a pretty quick exit. It was, however, most important to Dennis that we get to Amarillo by nightfall. Best laid plans?
From Muskogee to Amarillo is quite a trip in a VW packed to the point where Dennis and I barely fit in plus four suitcases on the luggage rack on top of the car. Adding to the loss of aerodynamics of the car there was a thirty mile an hour headwind on the steady incline going west. Perhaps fifty miles or so into the trip and due to the little channels that run along the top and down to the back bumper the luggage rack sled all the way down the back of the car. That made it necessary to reposition the luggage rack on top of the car, purchase some sash cord and tie it to the front bumper. This was done with quite a few words I had not used or actually heard or used in my life. Those words that cause a parent to wash your mouth out with soap or get a swift hit on your backside. With the luggage rack back in position we were on our way again looking very much like Okies going west.
Travelling at the maximum speed of forty miles an hour it was dark when we arrived in Oklahoma City. Since it had been a long, tiring, mostly silent afternoon in the car we stopped for the night. The next morning there was still a headwind from the west but we got off to an early start with only a minor glitch. Who puts their sunglasses in the passenger seat? Not paying any attention entering the car I accidentally sat on them. This caused more words and expressions similar to the luggage rack problem all the way to Amarillo when Dennis finally stopped to purchase some new ones. Whoops, remember the old Blue Laws when you could not buy anything on Sunday's that were not a life and death matter? It was Sunday and they could not understand at numerous stores this was a life and death matter.
I remember dinner in Springer, New Mexico consisting of a root beer and cheese and crackers. Then finally arriving in Red River very late at night. Dennis had made reservations for an A-frame cabin that slept eight and came complete with a kitchen. Kitchens are important on Honeymoons as who would want to eat out all the time. After all I was a pretty good cook and home cooked meals three times a day would save money and be better than cheese and crackers.
Up bright and early the next morning to hit the slopes. Dennis had skied several times in Durango, Colorado while living in Farmington. I had never skied before but how hard could it be? Just put the boots and skiing equipment on and go get on the Palmer lift. The Palmer lift is the bar that comes up behind you and you just sit down on it. Dennis got on first to show me how and went up the mountain. I was ready to go, I thought, but when the lift up came up and hit me from behind I tumbled off into the snow. I laid there in the snow trying to get up to no avail. This was my first lesson in character traits of my new husband. Everything is done NOW, not in ten minutes or even two seconds but Now. So in going skiing for the first time someone puts the boots on you, buckles on the ski's and off you go. Do not take the time to learn how to get the silly things off. Dennis finally came down the mountain and asked me how I could be so stupid. After I finally stopped crying I went to ski school where I remained the rest of the day far away from Dennis. We broke from skiing so I could cook lunch and of course I got to cook dinner before falling asleep.
The second day I really did not feel very well even though I cooked breakfast before going back to ski school for the morning. After a home cooked lunch I tackled the lift and the mountain all by myself. I found that skiing was really very simple if you applied all your roller skating techniques of edging to it. Also realized that after a day and a half in ski school I was a much better skier than Dennis. Maybe I wasn't quite so stupid after all.
By the end of the day I really did not feel well at all. I knew I was running a temperature but had chills at the same time. Good thing I only knew how to cook for four people so there were leftovers for Dennis to eat for dinner. He could not convince me that if I ate something I would feel better. Was he just being nice, wanted me to throw up or just wanted me to go into the kitchen and cook? Who knows but I can guarantee he ate leftovers.
Things did not look very good the next morning as I was still running a temperature and ached all over. Even though we were supposed to stay another day we packed up and headed for Farmington. All I can remember about the 231 mile trip that should have taken four and a half hours is that it was dark before we got to Farmington. We passed snow plowed up on the sides of the highway as tall as the car and it was so cold the heater did not seem to be working. How can you run a temperature and be freezing to death?
First stop in Farmington was the emergency room where it was determined that I had a temperature of 105 degrees and probably the flu. Loaded down with medicine we checked into a motel for the night.
Here is where I have to explain that Dennis had not found a place for us to live and his rule in life was not to stay in a motel/hotel any longer than necessary. So bright and early the next morning while I still felt like I had been run over by a truck we went looking for a place to live.
Do I really remember us taking the first place we looked at? There were not a lot of places for rent due to an oil boom in the area and there was a duplex that was cheap and furnished. Furnished is an interesting description. It had the lovely western pine furniture that looked like it had been made from old wagon wheels and upholstered in a beautiful western orange print of cowboys roping steers. I guess I could say it was clean but not "Hansen" clean. We unloaded the VW and discovered that the heater had been working great all the way from Red River. In fact it had worked so well that it melted Dennis's dress shoes. Thank heavens it did not melt my extensive vinyl LP collection.
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Having the car unloaded meant we could go pick up the boxes from Railway Express and go to the grocery store so I could once again do my thing in the kitchen. By the end of the day we were settled into our new home with food in the kitchen so I guess you could say the honeymoon was over even though I was waiting for it to start. I never read a wedding announcement in the paper again or looked at some one's honeymoon pictures when I didn't really wonder if any compared to mine.
What could possibly happen next...............
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